Doctors and other adventures

After 6 days without a poo, Jake finally pooed again last Wednesday and a few times more since!! The paediatrician says it is probably that his digestive system just isn't fully developed yet and he'll grow out of it. Anyway, that day I was feeding him and he kept stopping, straining and groaning and then would carry on drinking. His little face would go bright red during the straining and finally it paid off - the fullest nappy ever! He had really bad stomach cramps later on though, just when we had dinner guests - poor little thing, he was clearly in so much pain. We're not there yet with him, but I hope things will improve as he develops further.

I went to a mother-and-baby morning from the breastfeeding organisation where I did a course. One of the other women there also had a very young son who wouldn't poo and he was on laxatives already. It was good to speak to someone who was experiencing something similar, although I hope we won't have to use medication to help Jake along. It looks like we'll manage without as he's pooing more & more frequently now.

The last couple of days Jake has been throwing up after every feed and sometimes even during the feed. Yesterday it kind of reached its peak with him throwing up a massive amount which must have been the entire feed or close to it. I phoned the paediatrician this morning and made an appointment for him to call me back at the end of the day. However, they called me back 2 minutes later and asked me if I could come to the hospital straight away. I bundled Jake into the car and went to A&E where they were expecting me.

A paediatrician examined him and asked loads of questions. Then a nurse came and put his willy in a bag that was taped to his belly. (Apparently cystitis can cause vomiting in babies). After waiting a while, a lady from the lab showed up to take blood from him. She pricked his heel and squeezed out some blood into a glass vial. After a while, the blood wasn't flowing too well, so she pricked him again. Then she still couldn't get enough blood out, so she pricked his other heel. When that wasn't working either, she pricked his finger and finally managed to get enough blood. Poor Jake was screaming as loud as he could and his heels are black & blue now! We had to wait for the results, but luckily I could feed him there as we had a room to ourselves.

After a full 3 hours in A&E another paediatrician came and told us the results of the blood tests were fine. Everything else was fine too - they'd weighed him and he'd put on another 700 g in just over a week! The doctor said it was probably a stomach virus and I would have to keep an eye on him and make sure he gets enough fluids. I was so glad it was nothing in the end, but they take this kind of thing very seriously in a baby so young. They kind of scared me by getting me to rush down to A&E, but I'd rather go there once too often than once too little.

When we got home, Jake was in a deep, exhausted sleep. After I'd fed him, he filled his nappy to the extent that there was poo between his shoulder blades! Since then, he seems really happy, with only two bruised heels to show for his hospital adventure.

If in doubt...

Never in my entire life have I been so insecure as since I became a mum. At first it was all the advice we kept getting from everyone, much of it contradicting itself. Then came the health problems with Jake - wasn't I feeding him correctly? was I wrong in persisting with breastfeeding? Now things are going well with feeding and Jake's weight, I have found myriad other things to worry about. How long should we keep Jake's crib in our room? Is it wrong to let him sleep for a long time during the day? If he falls asleep at the breast, should I put him to bed or try to wake him up somehow? etc etc. It's quite exhausting!

On the plus side - Jake is doing really well. On Tuesday I went to see the doctor at the health centre with him and I held my breath when they weighed him. He had put on 300 g in 6 days!! He had also grown another centimetre, making him 57 cm now. The doctor at the health centre was full of praise and she checked all his reflexes, which were very strong. He peed all over her examination mat, which amused me no end. His output has improved anyway, as he did a massive poo on Wednesday and twice on Thursday, one of which was so huge it was in his neck!

Finally, on Friday, I went back to the paediatrician who said he was very curious as to Jake's progress. I undressed the little man and the doctor exclaimed "Now, that's what we're looking for!" He caressed Jake's rotund belly and commented on his chubby cheeks. He then complimented me on the good milk I'm giving him. We weighed him and he'd put on 500 g since our last visit, 10 days ealier! When I told him about the poos he had done, the doctor just laughed and said I don't have to come to see him again as all the problems have been solved. I almost skipped out of the hospital!

However, my milk supply has been very up and down. In the mornings, after a good few hours' sleep, I have loads of milk, but towards the end of the day, my supply has noticeably dwindled. I have been weighing Jake before and after feeds, so I know how much he's getting. This morning that was 170 ml, but it can be as little as 40 ml. I still have no idea what affects my milk supply. Some people have less milk when they exercise, when they're tired, when they eat certain things - I can't pin it on anything yet and maybe I simply have less milk in the course of the day, no matter what I do. I don't know. I'm trying to express milk in between feeds to stimulate my breasts to produce more milk, but that doesn't really seem to be making a huge difference. Oh well, as long as Jake is contented and continues putting on weight, I don't really mind. Also, it gives me another issue to add to my list of worries...

Food of love

We went to see the paediatrician on Wednesday. He wasn't too concerned about Jake's poo-problem because he said you see most babies grow out of it as it's usually just a case of their digestive system being underdeveloped. He said we could give him a few drops of oil before each feed to help things along. However, he then weighed Jake and he is back under his birth weight!! This did worry the doctor massively. He went to consult a colleague, who then joined him and also examined Jake.

They both felt Jake seemed very healthy - alert, cheerful and certainly not ill. The other doctor had done research into this very problem - 'silent underfeeding through breastfeeding'. Silent, because the child seems contented. It is more common than you'd think, he said and it's usually down to the child's physical inability to get enough milk from the breast, as your breasts produce enough milk for your child. So he instructed me to get in touch with my lactation consultant to make a plan as to how we can get more of my breast milk into Jake. It basically entails expressing a fair bit in between feeds. The doctors want me to continue with the breast milk and come back to see them next Friday. Fingers crossed our little boy puts on some weight!

The paediatrician did ask me if I was still fully committed to breastfeeding and when I said yes, he breathed a sigh of relief and said that he was so happy to hear that. If we are going to fatten Jake up with something, then there is nothing better than breast milk to do that, according to him. Since Wednesday I have expressed between feeds and we've given that to Jake in addition to what he gets out of my breasts. On both Friday and Saturday he pooed all by himself!! I was so proud of him and so pleased that the extra milk already seems to be having an effect. It gave me the motivation to continue the whole cycle of feeding-expressing with renewed vigour.

A couple of people have told me 'well done' on my commitment to breastfeeding, but several have said "Oh, why don't you just give him formula?" Not really what I need to hear right now, a bit of support would be nice. It's almost as if some people think I'm mad for persisting with that crazy breastfeeding lark. I'm pleased I have done so though - Jake is doing so, so well. Because of all the expressing, my milk supply has increased dramatically too, so I can give Jake lots of my expressed milk in addition to what he drinks at the breast. I weigh him before and after a couple of feeds a day so I know how much he's getting from the breast and then I express after the feed. He's getting roughly half the milk out, so it's no wonder he was underfed. The doctors (and a few friends) said he will grow bigger & stronger and will then most likely be able to breastfeed much better. I really hope so, but I truly don't mind expressing in between feeds - I know who I'm doing it for and he is absolutely and entirely worth it!